If you’re under 40 and get this, you’re doin’ good

The Adventures of our newest member!

Faster than a bleeding mullet!
More powerful than a local olive!
Able to leap wainscoting at the city pound!
"Look, crawling up my thigh! "
"Goin’ for your bird!"
"Oh, the pain!"
It’s Dell, uh … man!"
"Yes, welcome :FI:Dell, man,
deranged visitor with his mother’s jacket
who went to Woolworth for flowers and panties
far beyond those of moral men.
Dell, man, who can sing the chorus of "Old Man River",
bend steel bottle caps using a bare sweat gland;
and who, disguised as Davie G,
mild-mannered supporter for a great Southpolian newt pumper,
fights a never ending battle for moose,
gerbils, and the aerial melee!"